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Borders Girl

This is something i wrote several years ago, It is simply a way to try to get out in words my intense love of delicate emaciated beauty. But it is also a sort of way to try to thank the fragile beautys who endure so much to attain it. I know it is irrational to desire physical frailty in a woman, much as it is irrational for a woman to desire frailty to the point of complete rejection of physical strength. But for me the irationality of it only makes it more beautiful,enough of my babble.... Heres to the irrational:)

Borders Girl

I was in borders leaning against a stack thumbing through a book on incorporation when I noticed a tall pretty girl walking from the back of the store toward the front. I really didn’t think much of it at first after all she was one of about five tall pretty girls I’d taken notice of in the store. But I casually watched her as she headed toward the stacks where I was standing. I could only see her from just below the shoulders up from my vantage point, she was dressed in one of those sheep skin coats that she had zipped three quarters of the way up, a little odd I thought since it was chilly but not cold outside and it seemed a bit to warm in the store to me. She had straight dark brown almost black hair that flowed down the delicate curve of her skull to the bottom of her shoulder blades. Her dark hair contrasted her skin which was as white and flawless as bone china, which yet again contrasted her most remarkable feature, her large brown eyes, which at that distance looked almost black. Her eyes were very demure, intelligent and expressive, but also a little sad. Her eyes were framed by delicate, crisp cheekbones and her cheeks were a bit hollow, and her jaw line razor sharp, but proportioned so perfectly her face wasn’t to long. She rounded a stack and turned to face me now definitely headed to the stacks where I was standing so her hair no longer obscured her neck she was now about 25 ft. away. She was no longer pretty… she was a stunning beauty! She had taken on an almost translucent look as if you could almost see the fragile features of her skull through her skin , her beautiful head looked slightly to big for her body and way to big for her long swanlike neck which was a beautiful complexity of skin, tendon, windpipe and bone, God how I longed to touch it! Even the faint black rings around her eyes just lent to the aura of fragility that surrounded her, enveloped her, saturated her. I wanted her, I wanted her now, I feared her, because for all her fragility she carried such power of sexuality, beauty and intelligence, I feared if I touched her she would break or be forever spoiled like a butterfly that can’t fly because the powder has been rubbed off its wings by a gentle admirer. At that point our eyes met and I looked away blushing, she turned her eyes downward smirking a little. I was pretty sure she saw my excitement and I was a little embarrassed, how had she taken my interest, did she think I was a creep? She turned quickly on her heel and headed toward the bathrooms, I wanted to die! Trying to play it off I stayed put for a little bit trying to regain interest in corporate tax shelters for real estate but it was no use I was crushed. I put the book back on the shelf and was about to leave when someone brushed by me with the scent of lavender…it was her! I could see that she had just applied makeup because I could barely see the rings under her eyes, yess! She wasn’t disgusted by me, just a little self conscious. She stopped and pretended to be interested in some books about bombers and fighters right across the aisle from me and was now standing less than a foot from me and was running her tiny fingers through her silky hair in the sexiest way. It was almost to much this sight, and knowledge that she probably didn’t give a rats ass about bombers my heart literally skipped a beat and was now hammering wildly in my chest I thought I was going to have a f---ing heart attack! She was wearing hip hugger jeans although disappointingly her hips were hidden under her sheepskin coat, what a cruel tease! Her legs ran a long willowy mile from under her coat to her fashionable high heel clods, which boosted her height to about 6’1. I knelt down to check out some books on the bottom of the stack and when I turned back toward her I noticed she was now almost touching my forearm with one of her thighs, which was smaller than my forearm!(My arms aren’t that big either!) I glanced up to see that she was looking down making the same observation the look in her eyes told me that it thrilled her as much as me and that she knew I was thinking the same thing, her face lit up in a friendly smile! I was almost shell shocked, I managed an awkward smile and muttered something that was probably idiotic and looked away shyly. Just then she sneezed! And I instinctively said “bless you”. Our eyes met again and she smiled sweetly saying “thank you, you’re very sweet”. Having gotten it together a bit I said “hi my names Rob”.
“Yvette”(pronounced vetta) she said in a east European accent while extending her hand which I shook so gently it made me a little uncomfortable.(I grew up in the Midwest where a steely hand shake was a sign of respect and friendship, and sometimes shaking the hand of a rancher or farmer became a hand crushing ordeal! When I first came to New York people I shook hands with thought I was fucking with them.) Her hand felt so fragile and cool, its skin so soft and flawless against my hand which is weathered and scared from my years of fixing farm equipment on the prairie of South Dakota. When I released her hand she pulled her hand away slowly essentially stroking my hand and index finger between her fingers and thumb. I was totally unprepared for her to be so physically affectionate; her simple gesture once again reduced me to Gomer Pyle…. “SHAZAAAM, AH SHUCKS”… and all that! Her smile was now a bit mischievous, she knew exactly what she was doing to me, and she knew I loved it! I talked to her and found out she was a law student going to a local university. She was from Croatia and her father was part owner of Yugo before his plant was more or less demolished in the civil war; she had a thing for gambling, and loved bourbon….and teasing me! I’d never have associated the delicate angel I saw 15 minutes ago with gambling or bourbon but I was really digging her. We walked around looking at the coffee table books and I was becoming more and more fixated on her beautiful legs. The fabric of her stretch jeans would wrinkle in places that told me her legs were barely even filling them out and her knees wobbled slightly but just noticeably when she walked, she had just enough muscle to get her place to place and no more. We stood closer and touched more than relative strangers should. To anyone else in the store we were a couple. She’d press up against me as we thumbed through the coffee table books partly to gage her own tinny ness against me, but mostly out of affection. We pointed to the pictures in the books as we talked about them mostly just so we could touch hands; I even tenderly pushed a few hairs that were hanging in her eyes behind her ears. After about fifteen minutes of that, Yvette was
looking a little wan. So I asked her if she’d like to grab a coffee, she said she wouldn’t mind grabbing a seat because she tired easily from being on her feet. We took a seat in the coffee bar next to two fortyish heavyset women who watched Yvette intently. A minute after we sat one of the women next to us said to the other but plainly intending us to hear “my god! Look at her, so skinny you couldn’t hit her with a fistful of corn….lets get her something to eat!” Yvette’s eyes registered a little hurt from the comment but also a little pride which was soon replaced by a mischievous smirk “iss a little varm in here...no?” she said in her not really pronounced, but really cute accent, at that she got up standing sideways between our table and the women’s table and slowly, sensually peeled her jacket off.
She flashed me a sexy devil may care grin as she pulled her coat zipper down, and I knew this show was as much for the rude women next to us as for my benefit. Having the zipper undone she arched her chest out, and arced her arms out behind her scrunching her shoulders together in grand fashion, the coat slid off her like water slides off a ducks back and plopped unceremoniously to the floor. I as well as the two biddies gasped at the sight before us! Yvette at the sound of our collective gasp was absolutely beaming with triumph, and at that moment I fell in love…. well actually lust but at that moment it didn’t matter either way! She wasn’t done with her show yet, she stretched her arms (which were about the diameter of a pool stick at her bicep) over and behind her head bunching her shiny hair at the base of her skull showcasing the length and the extent of the extreme fragility of her neck,(which I could almost circle with one of my rather large hands) simultaneously arching her back and pulling her already almost non existent waist in even smaller, stretching her tiny skeleton which was wrapped in a baby T that I’m sure was intended for a grade school girl as it normally sat well above her belly button but with her stretching was now exposing the bottom of her rib cage. Her breasts were tiny but still pert standing about two inches off the series of graceful parabolas of her ribs. Her stomach sunk slightly up into her chest cavity so you could actually see the underside of her bottom ribs, it was as if her skin was placed on her bones then vacuumed drum tight against her delicate skeleton, so tight I imagined her little bones giving way and her collapsing in on herself till she disappeared altogether! I wondered to myself if she was ticklish on the underside of her ribs and resolved to find out for myself. Her body stretch/skinny pose left her hips every bit as hollow as her rib cage if not more from one hip point to the other her hip hugger jeans ran tight straight and flat as though shot by a transit because her stomach and jeans never make contact anywhere and mid point between her hips, her stomach and jeans miss each other by nearly 3 inches! Yvette turned to the women next to us crossing her arms and sliding her left thumb and forefinger effortlessly around her right arm moving it from her elbow to her shoulder and back while saying “Sorry I didn’t quite catch that” pretending to be responding to the gasp they had made seconds earlier. “Excuse us” one said in a clipped tone and they both grabbed their purses and beat a hasty retreat each looking a bit like a deer in headlights at this point. She turned back toward me with an absolutely radiant smile and relaxed her skinny pose and was now just emaciated rather than skeletal. She pulled her chair right next to mine sat down and leaned in and with a long fingernail pushed hair over and away from my ear and whispered into it her cool lips tickling a bit, what sweet torture, “you liked that didn’t you? “ I said “you know I did….I’ve never seen anything like you”. She pressed into me more and I could feel her ribs in my side “ Id like to see a movie…..one that wont have many people” at that she slid her other hand up my leg giving me a squeeze as I had been rock hard since seeing her about forty minutes ago and it was starting to hurt, but that little squeeze almost put me overboard I started thinking of Fourier series transforms, cows fucking, anything unpleasant I could think of just in the nick of time I thought of this lunch lady in middle school, a very sweet woman but unfortunately incredibly physically repulsive, she was about 400 pounds cross-eyed, bearded, had a wart with a beard and an abscess in her leg that was constantly being drained by a catheter hooked up to a plastic bag that was always at least half full of bloody puss….. as much as I hated it, I had to go there! That shook me a bit “Jesus Christ! do you know what you just did to me?” I snapped at her. She just smiled back knowingly “yeah I have an idea….. C’mon lets go” with that we were off to the movies.
We walked out of the coziness of Borders into the bright faux marble tiled mall where a smell of sweet perfume like the one sometimes put on silk flowers always fills the air, barely noticeable but soothing and always there, and I can never quite track down where its coming from prompting me to believe its somehow piped in through the ventilation system, a chemical signal that somehow gives our old animal brain an urge to consume possibly due to the association of flowers with spring? I shared my new theory with Yvette prefacing it with “I may be completely insane but….. blah blah blah…”. She rolled her eyes down at the floor for a couple seconds considering what I had said then her face contorted a bit attempting to suppress a laugh, the attempt was a failure she snorted, the kind of suppressed laugh that makes milk fly out of your nose, then looking at me seeing I wasn’t hurt and was happy to see her laugh, she broke out the sheep eating grin she always used when she was razzing me ”you know what, your right Rob,… you are fucking insane”. We had become almost freakishly comfortable with each other in the slightly less than an hour we had known each other. It turned out she was also something of a conspiracy buff. She leaned into me as we walked with her left arm wrapped around my right arm and her fragile left hand in my right and her head against my shoulder, I could tell that she weighed even less than I had figured earlier. She was about six feet tall and almost certainly under 80 pounds by the feathery insubstantial feel of her body as she leaned on me, a beautiful grown woman who weighs less than a child! I watched our reflection in the plate glass windows of the stores as we walked by, Yvette looked even tinnier pressed up against me, I couldn’t believe a woman could be so thin and beautiful as her! We left the mall and walked about 100 yards to the theatre where I opened the outer door for her and she tugged the inner door open with a bit of effort, it kind of reminded me of the way my seven year old nephew tugs them open I then helped by holding the door as she walked through, she smirked and rolled her eyes at me “I know…I’m such a wuss!” pronouncing wuss as an interesting amalgam of wuss and voose her accent so cute when I hear it I have to smile. As we were walking past the concession stand I heard “Oh my god, I would like… KILL to be that skinny!” and the reply “I know look at her THIGHS!” just to punctuate those comments I wrapped my hand almost 2/3 the way around one of her thighs prompting “Oh my god, did you SEE that!” I glanced back to see two very slender teenage girls watching Yvette intently their eyes glazed with excitement, they seemed a little embarrassed that we heard them. I don’t remember what I bought tickets for; it really didn’t matter anyway because we ducked in and out of several theatres before finding one empty enough. At one point in our search when we were walking past the water fountain Yvette said “time for dinner” and fished a bottle of Benzedrine out of her purse popping three into her mouth then gesturing the bottle toward me saying “hmmm?” offering me some with face slightly sour from the bitter pills dissolving on her tongue. I took the bottle shaking three out into my hand as she tried to drink the nasty flavor out of her mouth at the fountain, while she drank I admired her hip bones and spine because her coat rode up her back as she leaned her far beyond lanky body over the fountain which was set to low. She stood up saying “God those things taste like ass!, to bad the closest thing to solid food I eat has to taste like shit!” then she stumbled a bit and fell into me I caught her under her rib cage and steadied her seeing her eyes had gone a bit blank she recovered after a few seconds explaining “that happens when I stand to fast like just now, its one of the few downsides to having a diet that consists almost entirely of water, speed, and Gatorade”. I slugged down the nasty little bennys as quick as I could keeping an eye on Yvette whom I was now feeling quite protective of since she almost passed out. I saw that she was now looking extremely wan and weak, as if her pretty bones would collapse into a pile if you sneezed in her general direction which brought out conflicting feelings of concern, and deep raging lust in me. She tried to play off her obvious weakness and frailty but on our way to the nearly empty theatre she slumped on me and I carried most of her weight with my right hand which was propped under her ribcage we got to the theatre and were seated, she said “how much?” ,”huh?” I said. She continued “you practically carried me in here with one hand! I know you were thinking about how much I weigh, have been since you first saw me! How much? “Eighty two” I cautiously conjectured “you flatter yourself” she said “if I were only that skinny I don’t think you could have carried me like that” in her razzing tone, squeezing my bicep then patting me on the shoulder like I was simple. Her manner was teasing but I could tell she didn’t like the eighty two pound figure so I ventured “seventy?” she slapped me on the shoulder “I was hoping you’d say something like fifty to really flatter a girl, but I see now that chivalry is pretty much fucking dead.” Rolling her eyes, then instantly switched to an excited tone “Actually, you almost hit it on the head…sixty-nine!” “Holyshit!” I exclaimed “what are you about six feet tall?!”, “nope only five eleven” she said somewhat crestfallen. We chatted while waiting for the lights to go down, Yvette was really to weak to do much else when we first entered theatre but was looking a little more hearty by her gossamer fragile standard anyway, and was sipping daintily from a cup of ice water I got her, saying she felt a bit dehydrated but even water was sometimes a challenge for her shriveled stomach. The lights went down and the Benzedrine started kicking in, I felt it as a warm friendly glow that started just below my diaphragm and slowly radiated outward engulfing my whole body in a feeling of jovial well being, leaving me literally in love with the world, vivaciously affectionate… and incurably horny, it’s hard to believe the stuff’s actually very bad for you. I was actually glad that I could only get it from time to time because otherwise I knew I’d be hopelessly addicted… like I was now addicted to Yvette. I could see Yvette was rushing pretty hard also, her eyes were dilated and her face was flushed, and she seemed filled with a vitality that didn’t seem possible in such a fragile creature, I thought about it 3 bennys in a sixty nine pound woman, that’s quite a dose, especially at five pm even with the tolerance she must have built, she obviously didn’t intend to get sleep tonight…..and that thought drove me wild with lust and anticipation.
I half turned in my seat or at least as far as the arm rests on the seat would allow leaned back a bit and drank in the site before me. While the screen up front was dominated by a mouse named Stuart and his little bird friend who ever the fuck and a cat who seemed to have a poor attitude, oh great we picked a family movie I thought to myself. Yvette didn’t seem to notice; she was still coming up obviously rushing pretty hard, a sensation which to me is like being in a glider when it hits a strong thermal catapulting you ever higher. Yvette was staring at the screen with a look of awed rapture as if Stuart had showed her some beautiful secret meaning to life. The silver light backwashing off the screen put the delicate intricacies of her face and neck into full relief , her crisp cheekbones and jaw line the delicate little muscles that surround the hollow of her cheek and her still strong looking jaw muscle standing defiant against the fragility of the rest of her, the way the bottom of her chin was ever so slightly concave into her jaw bone, I could see her pulse between the tiny cords of her neck now strong and fast from the Benzedrine, in fact her whole body trembled slightly with her heartbeat like a gauzy lace disturbed by a breeze within. Just then I heard a THUD tha thwack THWACK! at the door(we were sitting in the back row in the middle near the doors) then a kid starts wailing, obviously the kid had ran straight into the door probably thinking it opened to the inside who knows what goes through kids heads. Then I hear a guy comforting the kid and saying “yeah well who’da thaaat runnin in ta a door’d hurt boy” in the central New York accent which I find so annoying Yvette popped her eyes at me startled and concerned but also a little amused. Then the guy starts in again “Joshua ..JOSHUA…..JOSHUAAA! put.. put!....PUT THAY-AT DOWN BOY!” obviously talking to another kid. After a couple minutes of commotion they all file into the theatre Joshua bawling, the door ramming kid mewling, and dad looking grim; none appearing to enjoy their movie outing much. Not wanting them any where near me and Yvette I break out in a fit of put on coughing like I’m in the death throes of tuberculosis, It worked Joshua tried to walk into a row about four down from us and dad yanked him back by the collar shooting me a why don’t you go to a doctor asshole kind of look and headed down front with the other fifteen or so parents and kids. Yvette tugged me by the shoulder down into a huddle as if she was going tell me a really juicy secret “this is a fucking kids movie”, her brown eyes dilated from the relative dark and stimulants so they appeared to be black as volcanic glass, deep, mysterious, slightly sinister, and unbearably sexy. I decided then and there this mission was a go come hell or high water; damn the consequences! Playing it off I just smirked and shrugged my shoulders then looked at the screen with feigned concentration “I don’t see any kids fucking….I see a mouse… and look an angry looking cat..and…” she just leaned back and slumped in her seat laughing with resignation “I can’t fucking believe this, we’re going to hell for sure!” “What are you Catholic or something?” I asked “yeah actually I am” she replied and fished a miniature set of rosary beads from under the collar of her shirt. With that we were back into banter mode which was killing me; my balls felt like they were about to explode like two over ripe melons with M80s’ in them. Both of us were not sufficiently comfortable with the situation but before long our conversation got softer and less edgy. The kids down front were really into the movie and weren’t yelling for popcorn or potty, I pictured them up there staring at the screen with the same awed rapture I saw in Yvette earlier. Yvette was now leaning against me with her head on my shoulder and her coat draped over her, shivering slightly despite the fact the room seemed warm to me, her body felt cool to the touch as she was so frail she had a hard time even maintaining her body temperature so I cuddled up to warm her and closed her hands in mine to warm them to. It was game time, she was sitting with her legs crossed above the knee I looked down to see there was still a tiny gap between her upper thighs! I had been holding her hands in the air warming them so I slowly lowered them to her thigh just above the knee. She took her hands out of mine and uncrossed her legs and made a show of gently stroking her inner thigh, teasing it lightly with her fingernails through the thin fabric of her jeans. I realized right away I was being schooled on how she liked to be touched, I must say I was a quite attentive student, spellbound really. I followed suit and her breath became deeper and the body tremor of her heart beat grew stronger and faster, she now teased her fingernail over her hip bone down into the hollow of her hips and straight up the middle of her hollow stomach which was now sucked in so tiny I literally couldn’t believe what I was seeing, my hands neglected their assigned but very pleasant task at her thighs and wandered to the vision of her waist which required the tactile confirmation of my hands to back up what my eyes saw. In other words I had to wrap my hands around her waist before I could wrap my mind around it! I slid my hands around her waist and felt my middle fingers touch tip to tip in back and my thumbs missed by about an inch in front. Yvette popped her eyes at me shocked “did you just put your hands around me?” “Almost there’s a little better than an inch to go” I said, she came back “I want you to do it!” So I squeezed and closed the distance prompting “ooh, you have to be careful with me!” “Yvette, my hands are ALL the way around you!” my voice cracking slightly from the excitement, Yvette squealed with delight almost like a little girl prompting a flurry of shushing from down front, she put her hands to her mouth to bottle the squeal and did a little happy jiggle dance in her seat. I released the pressure of my hands from her waist and gently teased them up the amazing valley of her waist to her ribcage and leaned in brushing her hair to the side with my nose and explored the delicate cords of her neck and sharp ridge of her jaw line with my lips. Her ribs glided smoothly up and down beneath her skin with each breath. I was amazed at how supple and flexible a ribcage really is having never been so intimately acquainted with one except for the skeleton in biology class which was wired together and rigid like a true cage. I ran my fingers up the sides of her ribcage letting them trip over the hollows between her ribs noticing the complete lack of the muscles that run along your back and connect to the shoulder blades, curious I felt her back just under the shoulder blades and it was there but just a tiny strip of muscle on her. As I made these discoveries I shared them with her as a series of comments which she seemed to appreciate because she slid her right hand into the hollow between her stomach and jeans to her pussy while the other teased about the hollow of her stomach and ribs or stroked my hair and neck or chest alternating teasing me with the softness of her finger tips and sharpness of her nails literally sending shivers of pleasure through me. My need for fulfillment by now had intensified into an agony, an agony I was almost perversely enjoying by this point, an agony that I wished could last a lifetime.



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